Did you know that the theme for a 35th wedding anniversary is CORAL? Yeah.... me either. My smart husband knew, however, and he came home last night with lovely coral-colored flowers and a singing card. The card plays "I only have eyes for you...." a song you would only know if you've been married as long as we have. But it was sweet because the picture on the card showed a couple on the beach, and Bob's taking me to the beach next week. He also suggested we find (or buy) a piece of coral to bring home and keep to commemorate our 35 years.
All of that is to say that the thoughtfulness of finding out the right theme, matching the flowers to the theme, writing a sweet love note in the card, finding a card of the beach and so on shows effort. And that's all most women want. We want to know someone thought of us. A lot. We want to know someone made an effort on our behalf. It's not about extravagance.
Sometimes feeling loved is just about getting the right color flowers.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
35 Valentine's
Today, my husband pointed out that we are about to celebrate our 35th Valentine's Day. I immediately searched my memory for the traditional 35th Valentine's Day gift and I believe it's diamonds. At least that's what I've heard....
But besides the diamonds, it really is a significant number of celebrations. It made me realize how blessed I am to have had the same man love me unconditionally for so long. He has been thoughtful and humble. He has been concerned about me and helpful. He has been consistently in love with me - and vice versa.
What I don't know is where the years went. Some of them I don't even remember. Fewer and fewer details are clear. I don't remember specific dates of some events and I have to stop and think about what years we lives in what house.
What I DO know is that Bob has always loved me, since the day we met in college. And I know that's rare and precious. I am also certain it is God's gift to me. We have never had a major fight. We have seldom disagreed. We have always been best friends. And we always will be.
Happy Valentine's Day, Sweetie. I look forward to many more.
But besides the diamonds, it really is a significant number of celebrations. It made me realize how blessed I am to have had the same man love me unconditionally for so long. He has been thoughtful and humble. He has been concerned about me and helpful. He has been consistently in love with me - and vice versa.
What I don't know is where the years went. Some of them I don't even remember. Fewer and fewer details are clear. I don't remember specific dates of some events and I have to stop and think about what years we lives in what house.
What I DO know is that Bob has always loved me, since the day we met in college. And I know that's rare and precious. I am also certain it is God's gift to me. We have never had a major fight. We have seldom disagreed. We have always been best friends. And we always will be.
Happy Valentine's Day, Sweetie. I look forward to many more.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
How to Face 2009
Last year was a trying time - the loss of my fulltime job, my husband's retirement, my daughter going off to college, my other daughter learning motherhood, and more. This year, very little has changed in my situation. I feel like I'm drifting a bit and I am wondering why? It's time to press in and find out...
Prov. 2 says He will give you guidance IF you do certain things:
v. 1 - accept my words
store up my commands
v.2 - listen to wisdom
apply your heart to understanding
v.3 - call out for insight
cry aloud for understanding
v. 4 - look for understanding
search for it like hidden treasure
Promise in v. 5: THEN you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. Wow. Wouldn't that be something! I WANT divine understanding and knowledge!
I haven't understood a lot lately. I haven't seen the big picture. But now I get it. I haven't done the "Ifs" to get the "THEN". I have to do verse 1-4 to get to verse 5. What I've done has been too superficial. Searching for it like hidden treasure takes a deeper level of pursuit.
God wants the IF to mold me and give me the character to find the "then" - the promise. I want the "THEN" without the "IF".
Maybe you're there too? Let's put the "IF" in 2009. The "THEN" is worth it.
Prov. 2 says He will give you guidance IF you do certain things:
v. 1 - accept my words
store up my commands
v.2 - listen to wisdom
apply your heart to understanding
v.3 - call out for insight
cry aloud for understanding
v. 4 - look for understanding
search for it like hidden treasure
Promise in v. 5: THEN you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. Wow. Wouldn't that be something! I WANT divine understanding and knowledge!
I haven't understood a lot lately. I haven't seen the big picture. But now I get it. I haven't done the "Ifs" to get the "THEN". I have to do verse 1-4 to get to verse 5. What I've done has been too superficial. Searching for it like hidden treasure takes a deeper level of pursuit.
God wants the IF to mold me and give me the character to find the "then" - the promise. I want the "THEN" without the "IF".
Maybe you're there too? Let's put the "IF" in 2009. The "THEN" is worth it.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Deadheading
My dark pink "Knockout" roses around the swimming pool fence are amazing. They bloom for months and make the whole back yard alive with color. They grow large and quickly, producing several buds on the end of one stem.
I was pruning them this week, standing in the beautiful fall sunshine and noticing how many roses were yet to bloom in November. When you cut a dead flower off the shrub, it's called "deadheading". The whole point is to get rid of the dead flower so a live one can grow in it's place. The more you prune, the more the roses multiply.
There's a spiritual analogy here (and God used the whole pruning thing in the Bible) that really hit me this week. We have to get rid of the "dead" in our lives to blossom with new life, but there is also a period of "nothing"... that time between the dead and the live. You can't see the new growth, but it's coming. And it's going to be beautiful when it arrives.
Sometimes I feel dead and sometimes I feel alive, but a lot of life is that in between time... when growth is happening, but you can't see it. Maybe you can't even feel it. You wonder if God's at work. You wonder if He cares that you just got pruned back and it hurt. You wonder if He's going to let the whole branch just die - or restore it with even more blooms.
I've lived longer than a lot of you and I can tell you the answer. He's going to restore it with even more blooms. The Bible is true. God is a restorer. He's a multiplier (ever notice he doesn't add? He multiplies!). He uses the time from cutting off to breaking forth. He strengthens us then. We wait. And then we see the beauty. And it's worth it.
I was pruning them this week, standing in the beautiful fall sunshine and noticing how many roses were yet to bloom in November. When you cut a dead flower off the shrub, it's called "deadheading". The whole point is to get rid of the dead flower so a live one can grow in it's place. The more you prune, the more the roses multiply.
There's a spiritual analogy here (and God used the whole pruning thing in the Bible) that really hit me this week. We have to get rid of the "dead" in our lives to blossom with new life, but there is also a period of "nothing"... that time between the dead and the live. You can't see the new growth, but it's coming. And it's going to be beautiful when it arrives.
Sometimes I feel dead and sometimes I feel alive, but a lot of life is that in between time... when growth is happening, but you can't see it. Maybe you can't even feel it. You wonder if God's at work. You wonder if He cares that you just got pruned back and it hurt. You wonder if He's going to let the whole branch just die - or restore it with even more blooms.
I've lived longer than a lot of you and I can tell you the answer. He's going to restore it with even more blooms. The Bible is true. God is a restorer. He's a multiplier (ever notice he doesn't add? He multiplies!). He uses the time from cutting off to breaking forth. He strengthens us then. We wait. And then we see the beauty. And it's worth it.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
The 7th Quirk
I forgot something. And it's important. Like a really big deal important.
I HATE THE BURGER KING MAN!
No, seriously. He is a creepster. And I'm not alone. Being in the advertising and marketing industry, I get professional journals and one of them recently listed the most hated company icons. Burger King Man rated right near the top. Had I voted, he would have been first because I would have voted over and over until he won.
If I see him on TV before going to sleep, I have to watch something else to take his image out of my brain. If I don't, I can imagine his huge plastic face peering into my bedroom window. I would have horrible dreams.
And the commercial where he's in bed with someone? My worst nightmare. I am not kidding. If I woke up and rolled over to see that, it would be the last face I see before I see the face of Jesus. I'd have a heart attack and go on to my reward. And trust me, I'd be right next to the throne for my trouble. Anyone who wakes up with the Burger King Man and dies from shock would have God's deep sympathy and be ushered right to the throne.
How do I know this? Jesus hates the Burger King Man too. He gives Kings a bad name.
I HATE THE BURGER KING MAN!
No, seriously. He is a creepster. And I'm not alone. Being in the advertising and marketing industry, I get professional journals and one of them recently listed the most hated company icons. Burger King Man rated right near the top. Had I voted, he would have been first because I would have voted over and over until he won.
If I see him on TV before going to sleep, I have to watch something else to take his image out of my brain. If I don't, I can imagine his huge plastic face peering into my bedroom window. I would have horrible dreams.
And the commercial where he's in bed with someone? My worst nightmare. I am not kidding. If I woke up and rolled over to see that, it would be the last face I see before I see the face of Jesus. I'd have a heart attack and go on to my reward. And trust me, I'd be right next to the throne for my trouble. Anyone who wakes up with the Burger King Man and dies from shock would have God's deep sympathy and be ushered right to the throne.
How do I know this? Jesus hates the Burger King Man too. He gives Kings a bad name.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
My 6 Quirks
Only 6? I'm sure I have more! But, my daughter tagged me to post 6, so here goes:
1. I don't know why, but when I eat snacks (pretzels, peanuts, grapes, etc.), I always take an even number. Yep. Give me 2. If I get 3, I have to take another. It's weird, I know.
2. I never step on sidewalk cracks. The proverbial breaking of my mother's back is a deep-seated fear. And it applies to painted parking stripes too, btw.
3. Can't stand to leave trash in my car. If there is a cup, a wrapper, a straw cover... it goes in when I do. Period.
4. NO ONE can write in my Bible or my notebooks or on my stuff but ME! I hate for anyone else to mark on my things. My husband has horrible handwriting and I think this started when he began "booggering up" my stuff with his crummy penmanship. He now puts all of my papers in a file and scrawls my name across the file (so I have to throw it away after I clean it out, of course) because if he writes my name on my papers, I hate it. He'll use a red pen or something ugly and mark on something decent and then it's ruined. Can't take it. So, now I am ultra protective of my stuff. No one mark on it or you are toast.
5. My counters are a quirk. I wipe them down constantly. No crumbs, no stains. If you clean the kitchen and don't wipe down the counters, you didn't clean the kitchen!
6. The "no toilet paper panic" quirk: if you're ever trapped in a horrible crisis and can't find any toilet paper, call me. I have some. I'm sure of it. No matter when it is, I have extra rolls in my house. I must have been through some kind of toilet paper roll outage as a child because now I want to make sure I don't run out. I store it in every bathroom and always have a huge supply from Costco's in the closet. I'm set. I don't have to worry.
There are others - like keeping a glass of ice water nearby at all times so I never get thirsty (and it helps my diet) - but you already think I'm weird enough. If you only knew....
1. I don't know why, but when I eat snacks (pretzels, peanuts, grapes, etc.), I always take an even number. Yep. Give me 2. If I get 3, I have to take another. It's weird, I know.
2. I never step on sidewalk cracks. The proverbial breaking of my mother's back is a deep-seated fear. And it applies to painted parking stripes too, btw.
3. Can't stand to leave trash in my car. If there is a cup, a wrapper, a straw cover... it goes in when I do. Period.
4. NO ONE can write in my Bible or my notebooks or on my stuff but ME! I hate for anyone else to mark on my things. My husband has horrible handwriting and I think this started when he began "booggering up" my stuff with his crummy penmanship. He now puts all of my papers in a file and scrawls my name across the file (so I have to throw it away after I clean it out, of course) because if he writes my name on my papers, I hate it. He'll use a red pen or something ugly and mark on something decent and then it's ruined. Can't take it. So, now I am ultra protective of my stuff. No one mark on it or you are toast.
5. My counters are a quirk. I wipe them down constantly. No crumbs, no stains. If you clean the kitchen and don't wipe down the counters, you didn't clean the kitchen!
6. The "no toilet paper panic" quirk: if you're ever trapped in a horrible crisis and can't find any toilet paper, call me. I have some. I'm sure of it. No matter when it is, I have extra rolls in my house. I must have been through some kind of toilet paper roll outage as a child because now I want to make sure I don't run out. I store it in every bathroom and always have a huge supply from Costco's in the closet. I'm set. I don't have to worry.
There are others - like keeping a glass of ice water nearby at all times so I never get thirsty (and it helps my diet) - but you already think I'm weird enough. If you only knew....
Friday, October 3, 2008
The empty, full, empty nest
Marriage is an interesting journey we each experience. The bookends are empty nests. The part in the middle is full of children, school work, activities, sports and family events.
There are some great things about being at the "second bookend" of life. We are right where we were when we got married - time together, no demands on our time, no race to get home at night, no bedtimes... Such a shift in our thinking. It's hard to believe that we can actually do whatever we want to now. Stay up late, skip a meal, eat any time, sleep in, do less laundry and not worry about homework deadlines. That part is wonderful.
What is also wonderful is realizing we are still best friends. We love being together, even it's just "being".
There are some great things about being at the "second bookend" of life. We are right where we were when we got married - time together, no demands on our time, no race to get home at night, no bedtimes... Such a shift in our thinking. It's hard to believe that we can actually do whatever we want to now. Stay up late, skip a meal, eat any time, sleep in, do less laundry and not worry about homework deadlines. That part is wonderful.
What is also wonderful is realizing we are still best friends. We love being together, even it's just "being".
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